They may visit family members and friends more often, set aside time to spend with their partner or donate their time to a worthy cause. Direct amends are not always possible or practical, but that doesn’t mean the individual is unable to demonstrate changed behavior. Volunteering for a worthwhile cause or supporting a charity can be a valuable way to make amends.

To fix broken relationships, you have to put a lot of effort into making things work. It’s not enough to say to someone that you apologize and feel badly for how you acted in the past. It takes a certain maturity and level of respect for yourself and the person you’re hoping to reconnect with to get past any past issues.

A Final Note about Amends

You might go to that person and take responsibility for what you have done wrong, express you deep remorse, and ask what you can do to make it up to them. You may couple that living amends making of amends with a request for forgiveness. I am not saying things like that are easy, they’re not. We can go to them directly and work through it (or at least try).

living amends

Figure out ways to improve upon them, and tell your loved ones what you’re working on to help you improve. “Today, I am pleased to sign more than 60 bills into law with bipartisan support, a clear demonstration of what can be achieved when we set politics aside and work together for Virginians. In addition, I have returned several bills to the General Assembly with amendments, hopeful that they will be reviewed with serious consideration,” said Governor Glenn Youngkin. When applying for the scholarship for the second and third months, the applicant must fill out the form below and complete the 2nd and 3rd-month essay to We know addiction isn’t a 9-5 disease, please feel free to call or text anytime, 24/7.

Help with Examples of Making Amends

We wrote an article about the difference between guilt and regret. We talked about the complicated processes of self-forgiveness and self-compassion. We’ve filled you in on things that can exacerbate guilt, like hindsight bias and survivors’ guilt.

I have finally come to terms with something my current wife said. “People treat you exactly how they feel about you,” and, “No one is required to be in your life.” Even if they are your children or your brother or your sister or your parents. I am not proud of that, but it is the reality of how I used to behave. I also made countless promises to her that I did not keep. It ranged from promising to fix something around the house to going to a family gathering. The FHE Health team is committed to providing accurate information that adheres to the highest standards of writing.


Although recovery in general must be done selfishly (i.e. you must put yourself before others in order to get well), Step Nine is the most selfless of all steps. It’s the point where we acknowledge that our behaviors damage others beyond ourselves. But to rectify this damage, we can’t maintain the same “me first” attitude that many of the other steps require.

It’s really hard to apologize to those you’ve hurt — it takes courage and humility and requires a deep, intense look at yourself. It follows, then, that Step Nine is a challenging step. Thankfully, there are tips you can take to help make your living amends permanent and lasting. When first writing your list, don’t worry about including everyone you have wronged.

Types of Twelve-Step Amends

Yet, to be truly successful at forgiving and releasing past wrongs, you need to go directly to the individual you’ve hurt. When you go directly to the person, real spiritual transformation is more likely to occur. It’s possible that the other person is unaware of the harm you have caused them, and making direct amends would make them aware and hurt them badly. And when it comes to our family and children, we might be particularly interested in speeding that process along.

FIRST PERSON: How the High Holidays reflect my sobriety journey – The Jewish News of Northern California

FIRST PERSON: How the High Holidays reflect my sobriety journey.

Posted: Wed, 30 Aug 2023 07:00:00 GMT [source]